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Too Much Entertainment

by Dan Kilian and The Million Man Band

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1.
Too Much Entertainment 02:41
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I've got to seduce my seduction Because I'm running in the next election I've got to sing my song Spread it round the world but I'm doing it all wrong I've got so much to do before I die But I just keep sitting here starry-eyed Because there's too much entertainment Entertaining me Too much entertainment Too much entertainment Too much entertainment And it's draining me Too much entertainment Too much entertainment I've got to watch my programs I've got to see my shows I've got to network all my social networks I've got so many friends that I don't even know I've got so much to do before I die But I just keep sitting here starry-eyed Because there's too much entertainment Entertaining me Too much entertainment Too much entertainment Too much entertainment And it's draining me Too much entertainment Too much entertainment I'm good for gambling and video games I've got to put these chemicals into my brain Celebrity biography, endless pornography Virtual geography, good God what have you done to me? There's too much entertainment Entertaining me Too much entertainment Too much entertainment Too much entertainment It's deranging me Too much entertainment Too much entertainment Did I mention podcasts? Comic books? Comedy clubs? Cooking shows? Rock shows? Magic shows? Casinos? Bingo parlors? Too much entertainment Too much entertainment Yeah it's no fun
2.
Two Different Kinds of Cocaine 03:31
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We met in a bathroom, made our way to the basement. When I told you I loved you, I wonder what that look on your face meant. You used to make me feel so young, now I’m getting a new kind of numb And we’re talking louder and faster Over each other trying to explain It’s not worth it, it keeps hurting But I’m feeling no pain I keep getting more paranoid You keep getting more strange It’s like me and you are on two different kinds of cocaine You know how to make me laugh But you’re killing my timing What a good time we have Every time we’re not crying We used to sing the same song note for note Now it all gets stuck in our throat, Now we’re talking louder and faster Over each other trying to explain It’s not worth it, it keeps hurting But I’m feeling no pain I keep getting more paranoid You keep getting more strange It’s like me and you are on two different kinds of cocaine You get the shakes and I get the chills What a price we pay for our expensive thrills You get restless and I’ve gotta run We’re not gonna stop till it’s all used up We won’t be done till it’s done Now we’re talking louder and faster Over each other trying to explain It’s not worth it, it keeps hurting But I’m feeling no pain You keep getting more paranoid And I'm going insane It’s like me and you are on two different kinds of cocaine I need the release Did you just call the police? Me and you are on two different kinds of cocaine We’re gonna have to quit it But honey give me just one more hit of it. Me and you are on two different kinds of cocaine. Toot toot!
3.
Silent Spidermen 02:09
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Shaking down the night For a shiny dime And an once of time No one gives a damn That you’re who I am Hell yeah, Shazam! All is fair when nothing’s possible We’re the pair that broke out of the hospital Hear the siren’s but we’re unstoppable We’re the members of The Silent Spidermen Senses warning that we can’t go home again Hide in sight because they’re always after us We’re dangerous we can’t get loose again. In between the lights Closing down the night We’ll never make it? That just means we might. We’re not asking no we’re just taking it Everybody else was only faking it Love has a limit we’re here to break it We’re the members of The Silent Spidermen Senses warning that we can’t go home again Hide in public because they’re always after us We’re dangerous we’re on the loose again And it’s nobody’s business Undercover kisses
4.
Shivers To Share 03:23
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I told her don’t be scared of the lightning baby She said that isn’t what’s frightening me It’s more the sound of the thunder, wondering What’s going to happen to me? You can measure the miles by the second Count the seconds by the year None of your patronizing explanation’s Doing anything for my fear I get scared It’s gonna get weird And none of your words will make it disappear I get scared Yeah I’ve got shivers to share I get scared Are you still there? I told her don’t be scared of politicians Cause they’re not really coming for us She said it’s more the collaborations You never know who you can trust And all your indifference makes no difference When the walls come tumbling down You won’t have time to pack a suitcase When the men from the sea come to town. I get scared It’s gonna get weird And none of your words will make it disappear I get scared Yeah I’ve got shivers to share I get scared Are you still there? Are you still there? Wake up from your nightmares baby! Screaming in the night! Sad fact is they’re coming right back The moment I close my eyes You can whisper your sweet nothings They’re not gonna do nothing Together we can weather whatever storm’s coming? Oh baby, you’ve got to be bluffing I get scared Yeah it’s getting weird And none of your words will take us anywhere I get scared Yeah I’ve got shivers to share I get scared.
5.
Cancer of The Heart 03:43
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I went to see my doctor for my three-year check-up He scanned me with his laser, he said “Oh dear, you’re all messed up.” I said “What is it doc?” He said “I don’t know where to start, But thing that’s probably gonna do you in is this cancer of the heart Your muscles are all twitching, and your tendons are about to snap And your system’s all sickened from taking in all this crap: Bad food, bad drugs and the sedentary life, and someone’s stabbed you with a knife, it’s tearing you apart But the thing that’s gonna kill you though is this cancer of the heart Look at all these people in the world who need your help You just sit posting pictures feeling sorry for yourself Look at all these people you walk past every day Every one of them needs love but you turn them away When they talk to you, what do you have to say? Your heart’s been corrupted, the conversation’s interrupted.” I wrote this song because I didn’t think there was such a thing as cancer of the heart, it was a metaphor. It turns out there is such a condition, it’s rare. The heart is not as susceptible as some of the softer tissue to malignancy, it’s connective tissue, less prone to tumors for some reason, but if you suffer from this condition, then my heart goes out to you, as far as it can, as much as it can. All that love that surrounds you Can’t you feel it? All that love that surrounds you Why can’t you feel it? All the love Why can’t you see it? All the love Why can’t you be it? You put yourself apart Cancer of the heart
6.
Big Brick 03:09
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I could name all the names I’ve forgotten I get called out, it happens too often I’m ashamed to say that I don’t remember You’ve been working here since last December Sometimes people talk and I don’t really listen I don’t get lonely I don’t know what I’m missing And I don’t mind all this isolation Cause I’m really good at watching television It’s a mile long, mile wide mile high and I’m living inside it There ain’t no doors or no windows You might want to see me you can’t get in though It’s a mile high, mile wide, mile deep, mile thick Big brick of my heart I go to parties I get loaded I leave secret messages you can’t decode it And everything’s a joke to me And I can’t recall the last time someone spoke to me Or I opened my mouth without just mouthing the lines Most people leave me alone and that’s just fine Cause It’s a mile long, mile wide mile high and I’m living inside it There ain’t no doors or no windows You might want to visit me you can’t get in though It’s a mile high, mile wide, mile deep, mile thick Big brick of my heart I’ve got love Just not that much I’m saving it up for a special occasion Once there was someone I couldn’t love her enough She took it and run now I’ve gone on vacation It’s a mile long, mile wide mile high and I’m living inside it There ain’t no doors or no windows You might want to come visit me you can’t get in though It’s a mile high, mile wide, mile deep, mile thick Big brick of my heart
7.
Alligator Man 02:46
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I’m the last great radio ventriloquist Underwater arsonist The omega and the egg I’m the only man you’ve ever kissed Half demon half exorcist I’m the M. Night Shyamalan twist I’m an alligator man! It’s all gotta happen a little bit later Manana Manana... I’m an alligator man Well my horoscope tells me I’m not superstitious And I don’t believe in visions Cause God came to me in a dream And He told me I was being too ambitious So I stopped doing the dishes Yeah I’m an alligator man! It’s all gotta happen a little bit later Abracadabra alakazam! I’m an alligator man Sitting here writing my manifesto Waiting for the wounds to fester The best is yet to be forgotten Your sweet tooth is spoiled rotten Even the rocks have hit rock bottom Can you believe how bad it’s gotten? Well hold on Baby cause Daddy’s coming He’s an alligator man It’s all gotta happen Manana Manana Manana... I’m an alligator man See you later! See you later! I’m an alligator man.
8.
Party Town 02:39
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Hot damn it’s a party town Up ‘til dawn and we’re just getting started Let the lions loose in the streets and call the police They’re occupied! Break into the banks take the bills Straight to the casino and lay the bet down Hot damn it’s a party town! Pay the hookers to fuck each other Take the cocaine just to come down Hot damn it’s a party town! All alone in my room crying Naked, shaking, I think I’m dying And I got no more money and I’m covered in blood And the only thing I feel is not good enough Hot damn it’s a party town Up ‘til dawn and we’re just getting started Let the Warthogs loose in the streets and call the police They’re broken hearted! Break into the banks guns blazing Take the bills into the hills Killing everyone in sight, it's amazing!g Gun them down! Gun them down! Hot damn it’s a party town My skull is on fire
9.
Guilty Feet 04:07
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I walk with a skip in my step Even though I’ve got a heavy heart From the sad scene I just left When I tore your world apart Cause I was cruel to the core Now I’m taking it out on the dance floor Those bad feelings I was feeling I’m not feeling them no more Because I’m dancing And somewhere George Michael must be laughing That song that he was singing, he knew it was a lie Spare me your careless whispers, guilty feet dance fine And I slide and I hustle Glide and I spin Shaking down every muscle Sweating away my sins, Cause I was cruel to the core Now I’m taking it out on the dance floor Those bad feelings I was feeling I’m not feeling them no more Because I’m dancing And somewhere George Michael must be laughing And an angel must be crying for this lost soul of mine Spare me your careless whispers, guilty feet dance fine I’m dancing And somewhere George Michael must be laughing And I don’t want no freedom, but I don’t want to do no time Spare me your careless whispers, guilty feet dance fine Should of known better than to cheat a friend, guilty feet dance fine.
10.
The Love Jihad 02:49
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All the arms of Shiva ain’t gonna hold you now You’re no true believer, you killed the holy cow And here’s how: You forgot that Love is greater Than any god in your pantheon Every kiss is a conversion Every hate is a perversion You’re not making a better version You can’t fight the Love Jihad You can’t find the love you had You can’t fight the Love Jihad You can’t fight it though you try so bad You can cancel all The higher denominations Make the people stand in line To cash in their chips across the nation You’re riding high ut I’ve seen your show and it’s unwatchable Trying to turn your brother Into some kind of new untouchable You think we’re so unlovable? You can’t fight the Love Jihad You can’t find the love you had You can’t fight the Love Jihad You can’t fight it though you try so bad We’re coming for your women We’re coming for your men We’re coming for you It never ends. You can’t fight the Love Jihad You can’t find the love you had You can’t fight the Love Jihad You can’t fight it though you try so bad.
11.
The Heroes Aren't Here For You 03:40
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The heroes aren’t here for you No there’s nothing you need to do Thank you for your service You really do deserve this At a safe remove When it all blew up you really showed your stuff You really came through That’s what we expect from you You really came through Twenty-one-gun salute The heroes aren’t here for us They’re the only ones that they can trust Watch each other’s backs when they’re under attack That’s what we’ll need when we send them back When it all blows up you know what we’ll do? We’re counting on you! We know you’ll come through We’re counting on you! Twenty-one-gun salute Wrap you in the mantle It’s all dismantled Hit the ground! The heroes aren’t here for you No there’s nothing you need to do Thank you for your service You really do deserve this At quite a safe remove When it all blows up... Twenty-one-gun salute.
12.
Always In Fashion 03:52
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Death of a thousand cuts in a single stab As I bleed out I grab all that I can grab The diminishing returns At least I lived to see the whole thing burn In the final flashes I saw the rising ashes Sometimes I wonder what’s the use Pulled from the electric chair by a hangman’s noose But I’m not frightened As the knot tightens They can’t hurt you If you’re already in the future Black is always in fashion Take your passion and take your fear Take your angry disappointment Write it on a postcard and send it right here Black is always in fashion It’s the last thing you’ll ever hear And it’s a hit, and then you forget it Make a voice memo and send it right here Learn to look it in the eye Stare it down and say “Maybe you’re looking for some other guy.” Hoping for a pardon But the Pharaoh’s heart has hardened And there’s always room For more servants in the tomb Black is always in fashion Take your passion and take your fear Take your angry disappointment Write it on a postcard and send it right here Black is always in fashion It’s the last thing you’ll ever see And it’s a masterpiece, take a snapshot, send it to me In the darkest depths of nothing something’s always tumbling out Hold onto your assumptions, but leave room for a little doubt How could we do it without you? We’re about to find out Nothing lasts forever Nothing lasts forever Black is always in fashion Take your passion and take your fear Take your angry disappointment Write it on a postcard and send it right here Black is always in fashion It’s the last thing you’ll ever know It’s the endless intermission Enjoy the show! Enjoy the show! Black is always in fashion Black is back it’s always in fashion Black is always in fashion Black is back!
13.
It's Only A Heart Attack 02:15
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If I seem blasé Clutching my chest on the carpet where I’m laid out unafraid It’s just it’s not that much to me This is easy It’s only a heart attack It’s only a heart attack I’ve had worse The worst hit I ever took was yours When you broke my heart it all went black But this is only a heart attack Tightening around my chest I’ll admit that I’m not feeling my best But don’t get distressed Whoozing and my vision’s blurred You think this is hard? This ain’t hard. It’s only a heart attack It’s only a heart attack I’ve had worse The worst hit I ever took was yours When you broke my heart you could hear it crack But this is only a heart attack It’s only a heart attack You took away something that I can’t get back It’s the ugly truth when I’m facing facts When I look in the mirror there’s no looking back And the bags are packed, the cards are stacked I try to line them up exact but there’s something out of whack And look at me I’m lying right here on my back But it’s only a heart attack
14.
Chronos (None Too Soon) 03:19
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All the Yohos Are swearing at our women While old Chronos He's trying to eat his children But he can't tell time Because his watch is broken And he's gotta get out Because the people have spoken He can't run his company Cause nobody likes his company He can spit and shout until his face turns red And clutch his tiny heart and then drop dead None too soon! His arteries choking None too soon! His system is broken None too soon! Maybe he'll be paralyzed None too soon! I can see the fear in his eyes As he dies None too soon! All the wannabes Are marching in a line They're waiting on a moment Yeah they're looking for a sign When the knives come out Their hands are clean And we'll do it all again In 2023 They try to put the cat back in the bag And try not to light these gas soaked rags Pretend to love all the things they hated Now that old Chronos has been castrated Chop chop! None too soon! Cut off his dick None too soon! It's a lousy little prick None too soon! Hear it hit the water None too soon! Fuck him and fuck his daughter She'll be coming right after None too soon! Close your eyes this might hurt a bit There's a new guy coming and he's boring as shit (Thank God) He's only molested maybe once or twice In this day and age that passes for nice Get ready for the new day coming Get ready for the new day coming If you don't like you can crawl away and die None too soon! Your arteries choking None too soon! Your system is broken None too soon! Yeah you're paralyzed None too soon! I can see the fear in your eyes As you die None too soon!
15.
Learn To Sing 04:20
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I can hear those pigeons Clawing through the wall Is it my imagination Or are they gonna kill us all? Rolling on the floor Like Denzel Washington In Mo Betta Blues Crying over you I met my younger self He asked if I could help I told him just one thing "Learn to sing, kid Learn to sing" The Mississippi blues Never called to you But that long tidal river Keeps on rushing through And I never found a job That could suit my mind Cause I'm well skilled At robbing people blind I met my later self I asked him it felt And what the future brings He said "Learn to sing Learn to sing" If I ever learn to sing I'm gonna belt it to the back For all the pain you felt and all the love you lack And I could wail and whoop and moan It don't mean nothing cause I'm singing all alone I met my younger self He asked me how I helped I didn't have a thing Learn to sing Learn to sing
16.
Fever Dream 03:06
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The sun is shining In the oceans of your eyes I get this funny feeling Every time you flutter by Are you a hallucination? Are you my imagination? If I look too closely Will you disappear? Are you a vision From a fever dream I'm having? I wouldn't want to wake up For a million years Just let me sleep Cause you're the kind of dream I'd like to keep You smell like toast and flowers You've got this power over me I could hold your hand for hours And never have to pee Are you a hallucination? Are you my imagination? Are you the product Of some elaborate hoax? Are you a vision From a fever dream I'm having? If I try and touch you Will it all go up in smoke? I keep hoping That what's happening is real Cause no one makes me feel The way you make me feel Are you a hallucination? Are you my imagination? The confabulation Of some dessert oasis Are you a vision From some crazy dream that I keep having? Cause you're far sweeter Than any ice cream I've ever tasted You're a dream So sweet Oh my baby You're like a pumpkin But you're prettier than that Oh baby You're a ripe tomato In an alligator hat Oh baby I can't seem to find the words But you're my little bird And that is that Oh my baby
17.
1000 Wishes 04:28
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The week you left I was trying to clear things out I was digging through the attic And in this old grey box I found A Persian lamp, I wiped it clean It’s a movie you’ve all seen There was a flash of light, a Genie freed He offered to grant one wish to me What would it be? I wished for a thousand wishes I’m no fool I wished for a thousand wishes Every wish I wished for you I let things slide I let them fall apart I stepped outside myself It was hard to let you back in my heart Ugly words crossed my lips I saw your face harden, you just took it Until you couldn’t take any more You walked out that door I’m gonna wish it didn’t happen anymore I wished for a thousand wishes I’m no fool I wished for a thousand wishes Every wish I wished for you The creature smiled With a flourish of his hand His lips twisted He said “Your wish is my command. You’ve had a hundred thousand wishes What’s a thousand more? You can wish your days away Just like you did before Here’s a thousand wishes Wish for whatever you ever wanted But you just wasted The only wish I ever granted I wished for a thousand wishes I’m a fool I wished for a thousand wishes Every wish I wished for you Not one of them came true
18.
Ringmaster 03:10
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I’m the ringmaster for this circus You’re gonna have to suck us or you’re gonna have to jerk us If you want to get in to the real show in the back Cause our freaks are the very best freaks We’ve got a full-grown dwarf and nun who never speaks And a two headed man who’s been decapitated twice He’s still walking around; he’s got broad shoulders We’ve got an old man who keeps getting older Every minute of the day he says He’s got an hourglass and it’s empty We’ve got a clown who doesn’t wear make-up Watch the Siamese twins kiss and make up And make out with each other and their mother It’s not a clean show but you knew that coming in And the bearded lady she’s going bald And we’ve got this kid who’s just sick of it all And I mean every disease, for a dollar you can watch him slowly die And if you’ve got five he’ll come back alive And if you’ve got ten you can look in At this taxidermied creature we did something weird with It doesn’t look too good but you can tell your friends you saw it and they didn’t That's right And any sin that you’d like to look on And any drug you’d like to get hooked on Any crime or inequity Because we’re the dregs of society We couldn’t make it in show business so we ended up here And I’m the ringmaster for this circus all you malingerers and lurkers Better come up with some scratch or get out of here Then there are those sexual favors I mentioned earlier... I’m the ringmaster to this circus At least I made it this far At least I’m not a whore But we’ve got those too! Gentlemen behind door flap number two! We got it all! We got it all! Ladies and gentlemen, we got it all!

about

Following a two part series of love songs, I'm throwing some spaghetti to the wind, addressing my other fears and frustrations, with a long batch of songs about entertainment, chemical abuse, evil politicians, our old friend death, heartbreak and a little more love. This one plays more in the realm of contemporary pop, and is a little more honest about how much of it is being done with a computer. There's a couple more swears than usual, which I'm sorry for, but it's been a year for swearing, hasn't it?

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released September 1, 2021

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Dan Kilian and The Million Man Band image

Dan Kilian and The Million Man Band New York, New York

Dan Kilian swallows hot coals of worry, regret and sorrow, then spits out rough diamonds of pop music. He's well regarded in the Antifolk scene, and whatever that is happening in Park Slope.

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